Bont 2 - 2 Presteigne

Bont XI v Presteigne

Presteigne arrived at Parc Pantyfedwen with the bad news that Black Ieuan and his mother had been deported. Fortunately, they had received Half and Half Ieuan in part exchange to keep up their ethnic quota, and he started up front.

The weather in Bont was fabulous, until the Presteigne keeper came down the steps and blocked out the sun. He was described as Sion Jones circa 2008, but he was more like the love child of Giant Haystacks and Andy Fordham. He certainly would have looked more at home behind the oche than between the sticks.

Instead of giving his players instructions as to how he wanted them to play, manager Rhodri Morgans decided on a different approach to his team talk, deciding instead to list the 'incidents' the Bont Lads were forbidden from referring to for the duration of the day, due to the presence of his new squeeze who would be watching from the sidelines. Thankfully, apart from the odd shout of "Clit Commander, give us a wave" from the back four, the lady from Pentre Foelas was spared most of the gory details of Morgans' life so far.

Bont started the game well, and Presteigne were pretty bad, though not as bad as Welshpool last week. Playmaker Llewelyn Hughes played a delightful one two with returning veteran Dewi Sion Evans, who had secured a release from his marital duties for two hours for only the second time this season, and steered a shot beyond Jabba The Hut in goal.

Bont pushed for a second and were rewarded within five minutes when Dewi Sion Evans fired a left foot volley into the bottom corner following a goalmouth scramble. Bont were well on top, with Presteigne's front two struggling to get into the game. The home side would have been three up at the break had winger Trevor Jenkins not decided to round the keeper when through on goal, which took about five minutes, prompting the ref to whistle for half time.

Unfortunately, the second half didn't go exactly to plan. Rugby player Llion Jones' toepoked backpass fell well short and keeper Sion Jones kicked the striker's shin after he nicked the ball past him. Stonewall penalty. 2-1.

Five minutes later, Llion Jones was turned inside out five times by Presteigne's tricky winger, who dinked a delightful ball to the back post where their unmarked striker scored the easiest header he'll ever score, prompting questions as to whether long-lost farmer turned tv presenter Ifan Jones Evans would have finished the chance. Seeing as the ball was about head height, two yards out, the answer was clearly 'No'.

Now it was anyone's game. Bont had gone to pieces, but Presteigne were still awful. Their defender should have seen red for a horrific lunging two footed challenge inside the box, but the annoying ref decided he'd got the ball, which he had, but that wasn't the point, as we see week in week out in the Premier League.

With ten minutes left, Bont were given a lifeline. Pensioner Andre Marsh played the ball past the keeper and was taken out by the enormous lump before he could turn the ball into the net. Red card but no penalty, as the incident occured just outside the box. Andrew Gilbert's resulting free kick was then brilliantly tipped onto the post by the stand in keeper. 

Bont pushed for the winner but, even after pushing centre back Gwynfryn Hughes up front, they couldn't fashion another opportunity, although Dean Colman's fierce drive sailed just wide.

The atmosphere in the changing rooms was very quiet, as we all felt it was 2 points dropped. Despite the lovely post-match meal of chicken drumsticks, homemade chips and dipping sauce, Captain Owain Schiavone sensed the gloominess and broke into an impromptu performance of 'Baby Come Back' to improve morale. Then we all queued up to call immigration to report Half and Half Ieuan before heading home.

Full time: BontXI 2 Presteigne 2

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Awdur / Author: Gwynfryn Hughes via Facebook